Promise Me
by miraleeann
Summary: By request. A private moment between Harry and Ginny.


**Author's Note: Something a little different from what I normally write. Enjoy! And feel free to tell me what you love or hate about it...nicely. **

* * *

"It's for some noble reason isn't it?"

He glanced up at her. Her hand was still in his. Despite the fact that he had held her hand so many times in the past, he could never quite believe how soft her skin was. "You know what my answer is. I have to do this."

She shook her head fiercely, her long red hair nearly whipping him in the face in the process. For the first time, he noticed the tears that we're clinging onto her eyelashes for dear life. Since they had fallen in love he had seen her cry only once and he had no desire to increase that number.

"Don't," she said softly. "Don't let us end like this."

When he had pictured this conversation in his head he had seen her as angry, furious even. He knew her temper; he had unfortunately even been on the receiving end of it a time or two. He had expected her to scream and yell, to break things even. He had been prepared for that. He wasn't prepared for this though. He wasn't ready for her tears and he hated himself for potentially being the cause of them.

"I don't have a choice Gin, I have to go. You know I have to go. I'm not going to expect you to put your life on hold for me."

He hated the words that were coming out of his mouth. He didn't want her to go on with anything. He wanted her to sit and wait patiently for his return - if he did return. He couldn't even fathom the idea of her being with anyone else.

Her head shook softly as her tears lost their battle and began tumbling down her face.

"Don't cry," he tried softly. He knew it was the wrong thing to say but he couldn't seem to find the right thing.

"Don't cry?" She threw him a disgusted look. "How can you say that? Don't you know how much I love you?"

Harry was silent as he put a hand behind her back and gently pulled her close to his chest. Softly he kissed the top of her head. He could feel her body shaking with sobs against him, his own heart breaking at the reality of what he was doing.

"I'll go with you," she said suddenly pulling away from him. Her face was full of determination now. "I'll help you."

Harry shook his head. He would never be able to forgive himself is she came along and something happened to her. He was already having a hard enough time accepting the thought of Ron and Hermione coming along, he couldn't swallow her joining them as well.

"I could handle it," she said in a hurt voice.

"I don't doubt that for a second," Harry replied. "You could also die. I can't put you in a situation like that."

"I'm putting myself in it!"

She was becoming angry. Harry almost welcomed her anger. The tears had stopped falling and he could still see the look of determination in her face. He didn't want to fight with her but he would take her angry over hurt any day of the week.

"No," Harry shook his head. "I would never forgive myself if something happened to you."

"So what? I'm just supposed to stay here and go about my life as if nothing is wrong? As if you aren't God knows where! As if it won't kill me to not know whether you are dead or alive or lying hurt somewhere."

"I'll find a way to communicate with you," Harry promised. "You'll know if I'm dead or alive."

"What a comforting thought."

Harry sighed as he tried to take her hand once more only to have her pull it away from him.

"Please try and understand," he said softly. "I have a responsibility. I didn't ask for but I have it and-"

"I do understand that," Ginny cut him off as she jumped up from her spot next to him. "Do you honestly think I am that dim witted that I don't understand that? Or that selfish that I don't understand that you have to go? I understand that perfectly. What I don't understand is how you can tell me that you love me and that you want to spend the rest of your life with me and in the next breath break up with me as though I don't even matter."

"I do love you," Harry said as he stood up. Her back was to him. "I never thought I would love anyone as much as I love you and I do want to spend the rest of my life with you. It's because you matter that I am doing this." He could feel his own anger now. "It is killing me to end what we have but it isn't fair that I string you along when I could very likely be dead by this time next year."

She let out a small sad sound before turning around. Her face was now covered in tears once more. "Stop saying that," she pleaded.

"I don't like saying it," he admitted. "But it's reality."

She shook her head as a fresh wave of tears started. In one step she was back in his arms, her face buried in his chest as she sobbed. A moment later she pulled her head up looking him in the eyes. "I refuse to accept that reality."

"You do?" Harry asked. He sounded dumb and he knew it but he wasn't quite sure where she was going with this. He wouldn't - couldn't allow her to come with him and he hoped she wasn't going back to that.

"Promise me that you'll come back to me," she said in a serious voice. "Promise me that you won't die. Promise me that you'll come back in one piece and we'll have the life we deserve not some tragic story."

"I can't promise that," Harry replied in a said voice.

"Harry James Potter I can be brave and I can be understanding. I can stay behind and play the role that you want me to play. I can sit through a pointless Potions class while you are off risking your life. But I can only do all of that if you promise me that you will come back."

"Gin-"

"No," she said seriously. "A lot of things will be happening in the next few months but your death will not be one of them. I cannot live my life without you. In fact, when the time comes I absolutely demand that I die first."

Harry smiled softly to himself as he hugged her tightly. "Okay," he nodded. "I promise."

He felt her body relax into his. He kissed the top of her head as he felt his own body relax. He had to have been crazy to think that she would just accept his attempt at protecting her. He knew her well enough to know that in the end she always got what she wanted and luckily for Harry, she wanted him.


End file.
